By Craig
If there was a dumb arse of the day award for yesterday, I’m sure that I would have been in the running. Whereas I did not punch myself in the face, I did something equally painful and equally as funny.
Anyhow, I’m going to share my story with you and put any credibility that I may (or may not) have on the line for all to enjoy and laugh at. I know that I’m not alone in doing this sort of stupid stuff whilst training, but for no other reason than a little comic relief, I thought I’d share.
So, yesterday I was down in my dojo, just doing my karate training thing all by myself. I’d finished my warm ups (Junbi Undo) and had started some circuit work with a timer. I was actually looking forward to a super hard Hojo Undo session. My first exercise (and last as it turned out) was grabbing the slam ball, and smashing it 10 reps x 5 times into the floor, all whilst in my bestest Shiko Dachi. This is good for the shoulders, arms, back and legs. I’ve always found this to be a really good all over workout.
I’d been using a slamball in the house, normally during the working week on a routine that when I get up for a coffee, water or whatever, I’d simply just do 10 of any particular exercise. I also had some different balls in my dojo, ones that I have not used for some time. Anyhow, I decided I didn’t want to wander back into the house and grab the proper slam ball, I was going to use the old ones in the dojo - this was my first mistake.
I set my timer, got super low into a shiko dachi stance…. ready - set - go!
Slam - Bounce - Smash!
The dojo ball had some bounce about it, in fact a lot of bounce, so after throwing it into the ground, it bounced up and smashed me in the face! - Ouch right! Not only did it hurt, it knocked me to the floor, leaving me completely stunned for a few seconds. I had a bloody nose and a super fat lip, so inside the house I went to find the wife.
My wife had the exact look on her face in the image below!
“Well…. me and my stupid arse pretty much just punched myself in the face” So, I stuffed tissues up my nose and applied a cold press to my lip. After 10 minutes of feeling a bit sore and sorry for myself I came right and ventured back towards the dojo. My wife, in her most caring voice said “I think you’ve had enough for one day, don’t you?” It had not crossed my mind to stop my training, just that I had to have a break to clean myself up.
By this stage I was laughing at myself for what I’d done. I was back in the dojo and finished my training for the day, of which took another 1.5 hours. In my amusement, I messaged the other Senior guys in group chat - they too found it funny that I’d essentially punched myself in the face, finding a whole new level of body conditioning training methods whilst doing so. Maybe I should write a book?
So what did I learn from my stupidity?
I learnt that self defence is not just something that involves yourself and an attacker, in fact the first rule of self defence is to look after yourself, regardless of the situation. Smashing myself in the face did not result in any winners or any losers, it simply resulted in a mindset for determination & perseverance to continue on.
I learnt that no amount of training will prepare you a surprise smash in the face. But it may just prepare you for what you do afterwards.
I learnt that I will never win any beauty contest if I keep doing stupid shite like this. Perhaps next time I should set up a video camera so I can at least make some money on ‘funniest home videos’
I learnt that with just a little more forward thought, this whole dumb arse incident could have been avoided. Will it happen again? well maybe not the slam ball, but rest assured something else will certainly come my way. Injuries and other life challenges come and go, it is part of all training and really it is just life in general. Make sure that you take care of yourself first, then continue on - perseverance is the key.
