The Paradox of Wanting a Bigger Dojo & Fewer Students

For the past decade or so, I have had this daily habit of scrolling online real estate listings, and immediately skipping to the floor plans like the pinnacle of emotional stability. Not for the bedrooms or the kitchen, obviously. I’m zooming straight into the garage, the shed, the ceiling height, the weird empty rectangle next to the laundry. Yeaaap… That’s a dojo!

Some people are out here manifesting dream homes with marble benchtops, spa bathrooms, and done-up basements for their Diddy parties….Well I’m just trying to find a place where I can flick my bo without accidentally inventing a skylight. At one point this wasn’t just harmless scrolling, I had plans. Actual plans and extensions drawn up by our Kuntcho Greig. A big, bad-ass spacious dojo. Then reality showed up, looked me in the eye, and said ‘that’ll be $700k, thanks champ.

So after I got out of the dojo tonight, I caught myself thinking… why do I even want a bigger dojo? It’s not like I’m trying to build a martial arts empire. I don’t want more students on a good day, I can tolerate the current number. On a bad day, I want even less, and then start fantasising about a dojo so small it only fits me and my dog (that I’m yet to get).

Honestly, humans are ridiculous because we’re never satisfied with what we have. The moment something works, we immediately start plotting how to ruin it with upgrades. “This is great… but what if it were bigger, newer, shinier, and slightly more expensive for no real reason?” A larger dojo. Better floors. More room to move. More room to host the same four or five people who are still going to stand in the wrong spot, at the wrong angle, and break my sanchin jars to top things off.

In kata, we don’t add movements….if anything, we strip things back, refine, tuck shit in, and squeeze elbows. So maybe the same rule applies here. Less space. Fewer distractions. Tighter focus.

So yeah, I’ll probably continue scrolling listings till the day I die, judging garages like a structural engineer with unresolved emotional issues. “Hmm, 2 metre ceilings….yeah nah, whatta shit house.”

But I’m slowly coming around to this idea: the “perfect dojo” isn’t something you build with inheritance money and a council permit. It’s built with the increasingly rare ability to tolerate other humans without fantasising about shrinking the room..... or maybe i do "need" that 10m X 12m afterall... haha

My kinda porn...

Sexxxxxy